Monday, February 06, 2006

Welcome to THE ALBUM ZONE !

Welcome, all. On the next few pages you will see what we've been up to. Or are still up to. Or, better still, what we fully intend to get up to in the future. This is the official Album Zone Blog, home to the thoughts, fears, and general misbehaving of 10 individuals who thought it might be a good idea to run their own Radio Station, mainly because they thought there surely must be something else than the same old 500 songs going round and round. Largely, there was not, so they decided to do something about it themselves. Here are their adventures. They're on air, 24/7, at, but here you can find out their history too - what they like and dislike, where and when they have broadcast, and why.
Check where they've been, what they've been doing, and how on earth they've managed to keep it going, with no finance except for what they put in themselves (The Album Zone is voluntary run) and with the magnificent help, mainly, from devoted listeners, to keep all the madness going.
And long may it continue.
We hope you enjoy our Blog, which will be updated several times per week, with many more articles and features also to be added in the days ahead...

Steve Lloyd, PR, The Album Zone

Previous Broadcasts : Radio Kick In The Head


The concept of Radio Kick In The Head was born, following a difficult labour, in a Public House on the outskirts of the sleepy, some would say totally unconscious town, of Loughborough, England. It was Autumn, 1986. At that time one Colin W. Mueslibar, and one James Barclay were, as they say in Radio circles 'between programmes' i.e. unemployed. They were sharing a drink (they could only afford one between them) in the Thrush and Piddle when the idea came to them. Both Colin and James had a passion for Radio and spoke of little else that evening. James had been 'in Radio' all his life, having been born in the back of the family Radiogram whilst his Mother was changing a valve. Colin too lived for Radio but found his previous employment, as the tuning dial on a communications receiver, restrictive and two dimensional. Despite their almost fanatical interest in their subject however, fate had not been kind to them. In fact, fate ignored them completely and so had everyone else as they sat on their respective bar stools supping their pint of Old Rat Mix through two straws they carried everywhere with them - just in case. As the evening drew to a close, Colin suddenly started. James, who had known Colin for many years, reached instinctively for Colin's tablets, but he was not to be silenced. 'You know Jim', he began, 'I'm sure there are people out there who would appreciate something a little different in Radio. Something better than the mundane, something a little more risky, something with some BALLS ...!'
His voice trailed off. Colin trailed after it, towards the Toilet, stopping briefly to wink at a young couple sitting in the corner near the dartboard, who were experimenting with each others bodies with their mouths, hands, and an interesting and rather impressive array of equipment found in the sixth form Chemistry labs. When he returned, Colin found James practising his 'appreciative nod'. This was a trick James used during situations where Colin might be about to launch into a tirade of the 'radio today is crap' variety. James had noticed in the past that, by practising the 'nodding technique', the movement of his head usually provided a sufficient distraction for Colin to forget what he was about to say. This normally saved both Colin and himself the inconvenience of having to find yet another Pub where they were not known. The list of places where they were invited to 'take their custom elsewhere' (straws included) had grown to such a degree that 'elsewhere' was now a rare commodity. But Colin was not to be halted. 'I've been thinking', he said, looking straight past James toward the couple he had seen on the way to the Toilet. 'We could start a Station ourselves'. He fiddled with the zip of his jeans as if trying to check by tactile methods alone, whether the zipper was occupying it's usual position at or near the respectable moral high ground, or whether it had slipped down to reveal the various graduations of depravity which were Colin's undergarments. And why ? Well, that couple were looking at him, furtively. 'You know', he continued, now satisfied that he had kept a stiff upper zip, 'we could just go on air and communicate with people'. The idea sprang full blown, and without a safety net, into James' mind. 'You mean', he asked Colin, 'you think we could just go ahead and do it?' 'Why not?', said Colin, now checking the outer perimeters of his nose for signs of god-knows-what.
'I've got the keys to the Campus Station at the University, no one will be around now. We could just go in, turn off the sustaining service, turn on the Studio and there we are...' I should mention, Dear Reader, that Colin was working for the Student Union at Loughborough at that time, and did indeed possess the keys which were later to open up the anarchy which was to become Radio Kick In The Head. Thus it was that, some 45 minutes later, following a two mile walk and a minor problem with a patch panel, Radio Kick In The Head made it?s first, almost memorable, but in reality totally forgettable - transmission. But - 'why the name? - I hear you ask'. 'Why not?' - I answer. Actually, it came about because Colin said that if the average bunch of listeners enjoyed the sort of stuff that was routinely fed to them, they deserved a kick in the head, - so this is exactly what they got. The exact timing of the start of the first Broadcast was important since it was necessary that no one from the University 'authorities' realised that the Studio had been invaded. Had they done so, this would immediately have resulted in a visit from a particular security man - well known to Colin - codenamed 'Captain Birds Eye' for reasons which we will keep secret for rear of retribution. 'The Captain' was a born sadist - either that or he had an exquisitely developed sense of humour so subtle that it was completely undetectable. On one occasion I was returning from an evening at a local Hostelry, suitably refreshed, and needed to 'pay a call' in one of the toilets on Campus. As I approached the Toilet block, The Captain appeared from behind some bushes brandishing a set of keys. 'I'm locking that building' he said. 'I won?t be a moment' I said, 'but I have to make a call'. 'Fine by me', said the Captain, grinning. I was astounded ! He was actually being reasonable ! 'Thanks', I said. 'No problem', he added, 'you can do what you like - but I'm locking that building'. 'But I'll be locked in', I protested. He was just that sort of person, really. A complete Bastard. On one occasion he stopped Mueslibar driving the Minibus on Campus late at night, as a back light wasn't working. 'You can't drive it like that' said the Captain, so Mueslibar locked it up and walked away from it. 'You can't leave it there' said the Captain, to which Mueslibar replied, 'Well, I can't drive it you said, and I can't leave it there, so what do you suggest I do?' Touche ! Thing was, Mueslibar was carrying a Radio Microphone at the time, so the whole scenario was being recorded back at the Radio Station. In the end, Mueslibar drove the van. So you see, whilst often amusing, an encounter with the Captain could prove troublesome. For this reason the staff at RKITH (just myself and Colin at that time) were keen to avoid confrontations, especially as Colin was already on his second 'formal warning' due to sense of humour failures beyond his control.We elected to go 'Live' exactly after the News, since this would make things as seamless as possible. Whilst Colin prepared the Studio, I busied myself in the Record Library, selecting tracks for this new 'golden age' of Radio. The News went out as usual, followed by the shock announcement from Colin : 'Hi, this is Radio Kick In The Head, your overnight alternative'. RKITH was born. I forget what the first record was, although I remember Colin playing a certain Ian Dury track littered with interesting language, which he back-announced as 'Fog In Aiden', this being a very loose translation of course. As I recall, we did about 3 hours on that very first night, the Shows being very much a mixture of the sort of music you now hear on the Album Zone, which of course was never played on the Station during what they called the 'normal' Programming. There was of course inpromptu send-ups of other Presenters, and completely made-up problems tackled by the Agony Uncle for RKITH, one Mr. Churchill. It was just a laugh as far as we were concerned, nothing more, nothing less. It was not until some time later that the Programme Controller of the Campus Station told us he had 'heard a tape of the Show'. Of course, we expected instant dismissal. Instead he asked us if we would consider making this a regular feature. About 20 Programmes were produced in total, one of which was sent - without our knowledge I might add - to a National competition organised by Radio 1. We won first prize. And I'm not joking. This probably says more about the other entries than it does about our own efforts.
The Shows gradually evolved to contain many interesting features, such as 'The Astroline', a series of Horoscopes for signs such as 'Giblet', 'Trout', and 'Herpes'. There were Vox-pop interviews, off the cuff, with people from Citizens Band Radio - at that time something of an unknown quantity here in the UK, and a series of random phone calls to public Telephone boxes around the town - Yes - people did answer the ringing tones as they walked past, and when they did, we would ask them their advice and opinions on a wide range of topics such as Sex, the purchase of 'the ideal Car', or what the weather was like where they were. Anything, really. One day, we decided to do an outside Broadcast, and thought the roof of the Radio Station would be an ideal location for this major event, and interviewed passers by below before throwing a bucket of cold water on them - 'Live' on air of course. Spoof adverts were prepared, although the best were, unfortunately, never aired. However, the product was awesome. In fact, we at the Album Zone are proud to offer it to you now. It shows you the secret to making all the money you could ever dream of ! All you need to do to receive the secret is to send us £1000. Now, we know the formula works and to prove it, if you take up our offer we will provide personal financial statements guaranteed by somebody-or-other to support our outrageous claims.Well, that's all the time I have to tell you of this infamous beginning for me in this rather strange world of alleged Radio. No doubt if you contact us via Russ Feld - our PR Man here at AZ - he can arrange to send you copies of highlights (?) From the Radio kick In The Head Programmes, either on Cassette, Minidisc, or Compact Disc - for a small fee of course - we're not bloody made of money you know. Remember, our Broadcasts rely on your support, and our support relies on you supporting us, blah blah blah.Until next time this is James Barclay saying, 'Christ ! - I'm glad that's over, and keep in touch, because together you know we can all make it happen. Whatever 'IT' is, of course....'

Previous Broadcasts : Radio Stad Harlingen, Holland


For this report, we return to August 1998, to the small fishing town of Harlingen, Holland, which saw Johnny Reece, Gil Legine, Andy Brooks and Richard Bismarck take part in the 'Fishing Days' Festival via the local Radio Station.
R.S.H. (Radio Stad Harlingen) is the local Station for the town of Harlingen, northern Holland, in the Friesland region, and Broadcasts on both FM and Cable.
Sietse Brouwer was the Programme Director of the Station, and, as many of you will know, had Presented for both Radio Caroline and the Album Zone. The town of Harlingen has its own 'Fishing Days' Festival every year near the end of August, and RSH regularly Broadcast special Programmes to cover this event. In 1997, Johnny Reece and colleagues were invited to take part as Radio Caroline, with Shows coming 'Live' from the RSH Studios. Sietse wished to take things one step further though for the following year, planning to Broadcast the special Programmes for the event from a Ship. Many ideas were originally looked into, including using the old Veronica Ship 'Norderney' (anchored in the next town) as a base. Finally, with the help of the Sea Cadets, it was decided the Minesweeper M.V. Sittard would be our home for the event. It was our second trip to Harlingen for the 'Fishing Days' Festival. Our good friend Sietse Brouwer from RSH was co-ordinating the whole event, and thought our second Broadcast within a year should have a more 'nautical' feel. After some lengthy negotiations, our Home and Studio base for the whole event was indeed to be the Minesweeper the MV Sittard, nowadays a training base for the Sea Cadets.
The Main Broadcast Studios were to be transferred onto the Ship, set up, and within hours be ready for Broadcasting. As our own U.K. 'Crew' had just been working together, along with Sietse at a Radio Caroline RSL Broadcast just weeks previously, and Sietse being a keen supporter, we were to Broadcast under that name, and try to raise awareness for the Station from the Programmes, and sell Merchandise too. Quite a task. It became 'Radio Caroline via RSH' for the 3 nights of our Programming, with the daytime spots featuring the normal Programming of RSH. Much credit and thanks must go to all the Management and Personnel from the Sea Cadets for making us feel so welcome. It was decided we would have 4 Presenters, Johnny Reece, Gil Legine, Andy Brooks, and Richard Bismarck. We travelled over on a Tuesday afternoon, on the fast Harwich - Hook HSS Ferry, and then began the long drive north to the wonderful town of Harlingen. We were joined then by our late friend David Francis from Caroline Sales, who kindly arranged for the return Fares on the HSS to be paid for us. David was a gem, as anyone who knew him would testify. The next day we were joined by Martin Wallis, whose job it was to set up the 'Shop' on board. With Martin, I am very glad to say, came Chris Cheek - our Cook for the next 4 days. Those who know Chris knew what to expect next, Eggybread ! After all, we had to pass on our own special culinary tips to the Dutch. The Galley then became 'Chris's Caff' with a special Menu being posted at the door on a daily basis. Before the thought of any Broadcasting had even entered our heads, we were all off to the local Supermarket to buy supplies. Naturally, the first night was spent touring a selection of Bars in Harlingen. Did you really expect anything else ? The serious stuff began on Wednesday evening. RSH would 'close down' and we would become 'Radio Caroline via RSH' from 8pm through until 7am for the next 3 evenings. Brilliant fun. Our accommodation was directly underneath the Studio set up on Board - so no chance of missing any of the Programmes - even if you wanted to sleep. The line-up for each evening was Brooksy, Reecey, Gil, then Bismarck. Naturally, the body clocks of those on Board would take something of a battering over the following days. But we didn't mind - Sietse had done an amazing job putting it all together, and we didn't want to let him down. The language barrier wasn't a problem, as we spoke with a mixture of Music, Beer and Eggybread. Not to be outdone, we were introduced to a new delicacy by RSH - called Sugarbread. Reecey has since even had Sugarbread sent over from Holland - it must be good. In the daytimes, we all became tourists, and, by night, the Music kicked in. The publicity machine was in full swing, with various Journalists calling in for Interviews on a daily basis, and Local TV got a look in too. There were many features in the local Press, and the amount of visitors to the Ship grew on a daily basis. National Radio called in too, to have a chat with us all. Martin did a brisk business in his Shop, just yards from the on-air Studio. As for Chris, he was rather a victim of his own success. 'Eggybread' was taking over, it seemed, as the new national dish. We spent a lot of time exploring, and of course doing the Shopping for the ever more popular 'Chris's Caff'. which was becoming rather more time-consuming than we first thought. Unfortunately, the first 2 days brought us very poor weather, so we had to often find some locations in the daytime hours when exploring, which meant that we spent a great deal of our daytime hours in a selection of local Pubs. Obviously, we were heartbroken. Crestfallen, in fact. Ahem. However, we did not let this spoil our enjoyment of doing the 'Live' Programming, if we were sober. On the final evening, a Friday night, we decided to thank Sietse for all of his hard work by letting him have some of our airtime, to do with what he wishes. This was of course a thinly disguised attempt for us all to disappear to eat drink and be merry at one of the local hostelries, which we did. But, alleged Professionals that we are, we returned in time to complete the final nights Shows. There was one catch though. When the Broadcast ended at 8am - no sleep ! The Studio had to be dismantled and returned to RSH - and we had to leave the vessel - as it was due to sail at 10am. The Studio and links were removed in double-quick time, and in the end the Sea Cadets let us all stay on Board while she sailed up the river anyway. Superb. The MV Sittard took it's berth for the weekend alongside some splendid Warships, for the final day of the Fishing Days Festival. Our sincere thanks to the Sea Cadets for their hospitality, and for letting a bunch of lunatics aboard their vessel without a care in the world. Also thanks to all at RSH, particularly Sietse, without whom none of this would have ever happened. Hopefully, one day, we will return to do it all again. We all had a splendid time and wouldn't hesitate for a second to repeat the exercise. Ta much to everyone, and by the way, we've run out of Sugarbread - more please ! ...

Previous Broadcasts : Fugue FM, France


If there is one Broadcast, or 'series of Broadcasts' that some of the AZ crew have been involved in, in the past, that we miss most of all, it's got to be Fugue FM. Located just outside Paris in the 'royal' town of Compiegne, the first time I worked there was way back in 1993. In general, Radio Stations, (particularly here in the UK) are not really considered to be 'welcoming'. But I have never felt so much 'at home' as when I was at Fugue. The original idea for me to take part in some special Programmes at Fugue came after the Programme controller there, Pierre Desaint, heard some Satellite Shows I had done from the UK for Radio Caroline. Almost before I knew what was happening, a 5 week 'stint' had been arranged - stretching from late Sept. to Oct. in 1993. But here's the thing - I couldn't speak barely a word of French, and therefore expected to have a 'late night berth' (which I always prefer anyway). Imagine my shock on arriving there to find out I was on in the biggest audience-reaching time in the region - drivetime ! Firstly though, I arrived the day before, to meet up with Pierre, and also the Station Manager, Mattheu Quetel, and Advertising chief Pascal Loisel. There seemed to be just one 'English speaker' on the staff, a journalist called Manu (who, as I later found out, also presented a rather superb 'Album Show' - not a stones throw from what we at AZ do now.)I was due to start on the Monday at 5pm, with the Show itself running through till 8. The night before, I was invited out by some of the DJs and Journalists - with Manu acting as translator. It was a great night, too much Beer of course, but great fun. And - I had never met such a friendly bunch of people - I felt at home immediately - and hadn't even been 'on-air' yet. My first day, of course, I was terrified. There was so much to remember, and luckily for me, Pierre was there to guide me through (it was his Show I was covering for the duration). Local news - done 'Live' every 30 mins past the hour, traffic reports at the 40 min. mark, TV features, Cinema reviews and features, 'Live' National News on the hour - and of course all of my 'cues' for these - in French. So, I had to learn quickly. Fugue then had 2 separate FM frequencies, covering the towns of Compiegne and Beauvais, with the signal also stretching down into central Paris. I remember asking Pierre a question just before I went on-air on that very first day - and I wish I'd kept my mouth shut. "Is it a very big audience at this time of day" ?, I innocently asked. "Only about 2 million", he replied. Christ ! - and I couldn't even speak the language ! I was doing it in English, of course - well, Scottish, anyway. The features of the chaos known as drivetime were over by 7pm. From 7-8 every night I did that days 'Rock Date Diary' which went down very well with the 'musos' of the town - including a massive population of students (Compiegne has the biggest University in France). By the second day - I loved it. I had met up too with some of the students on the evening following my first Show - as they'd called up from the University to invite me over there. My Hotel was really nice too - in the centre of town, close to the river. I also had use of a very posh local restaurant in the evenings - where I could actually order what the hell I liked - then just sign the Bill - which then got sent to Fugue for payment. My God - no wonder I miss it ! I do admit - I did take advantage a bit (can you blame me ?) by occasionally having some recently-met-friends 'over for dinner' at that restaurant. Brilliant. I also met, and became mildly obsessed with, a girl from Kent who was spending 6 months working in the town. Debbie was her name. Or, should I say, 'Debbie the Angel' as I referred to her on-air, as she looked after local handicapped people. The number of times I played 'Angel' by Jimi Hendrix for her became legend. Pathetic eh ? Well, you know what I'm like. The most bizarre things started to happen in the second week of my stay, when I was asked to give 'a talk' on Radio Caroline at the local School. This was followed by some 'live' TV interviews. It was weird, and I guess to say I was rather taken aback by it all is a massive understatement. As the end of the 5 week spell grew nearer - I began to dread leaving, I was having such a great time. I was spending a fortune though - money I could ill afford - after all I had taken over a month off work to do this. I did get some 'expenses' though from Fugue - but the infamous 'free restaurant' was closed at weekends - when most of the Students decided to travel home for 2 days. The town was much, much quieter at weekends because of this. The last night was amazing - out and about after the final Show for a bit of a party night with all the Station staff - excellent. Obviously, we all kept in touch - and Pierre was aware of our monthly trips to Radio 6 - just 2 hours away. Almost a year to the day since my first visit to Fugue - and on the same weekend as one of our many Radio 6 visits - I was invited back to Fugue to do an 'overnight special' on the Friday night. Brooksy was travelling for the R6 trip - so we shared the Programme at Fugue, it was September 94 - and a precedent was set - an annual 'return' seemed to be the order of the day. In early 1996, we did the same thing again. Then, in early 1997, I was speaking to Pierre and told him of our upcoming 'extended' weekend at Radio 6, which was about to happen, where we were bringing along Johnny Zero and the London Angels for an 'unzipped' session (OK, I know 'unplugged' is the phrase - but that's what Zero wanted to call it). The reaction from Pierre was immediate - "come over a few days early and do it all here too" ! So we did ! Fugue had 'grown' somewhat in the meantime, adding a third FM frequency. Pierre really worked hard for us too on the run-up to the Shows that weekend - we heard the adverts for the Progs - with 'promos' for Mr. Zero and his crew - all down the motorway. The evening itself was great fun - but the magnitude of the publicity surrounding the whole thing - including some more TV and Radio interviews on the afternoon prior to it all - did get to me a bit, and I was so nervous that I couldn't eat beforehand for fear of being sick. That had never, ever happened to me before. A good friend of mine, a French girl called Barbara was there to calm me down - she was our official 'translator' ! Of course, the Champagne flowed - courtesy of the good people of Fugue FM. This was before the Show, which made the Programmes, and 'session' from Zero and the chaps 'interesting' to say the least. Pictured here are Pascal (who seemed to be able to speak perfect English in minutes !) and Pierre (standing), with Johnny Zero and Hunter, from the Band. The Fugue staff stuck around for a few hours, then went home about 1 a.m, and left us to it. Zero and the Band played around 6 numbers, fuelled of course by Champagne. The Shows themselves were hosted by myself and Brooksy. We did 2 Shows each - going right through until 7a.m. (We had begun at 9pm the night before) and then Pierre reappeared around 6.30 in the morning - bringing us breakfast, no less. Now you know what I mean when I say I miss these people. It reminds me of a brief chat I had with a couple of the Fugue staff on my last night there in 93', when they said if I learnt French - I could have a Show 5 nights a week, and would I think about it. Well, it was too much of a big move at the time for me to think seriously about, and besides I really wasn't confident enough at the time to seriously consider it. And that decision, is something I have honestly regretted since. All in all, we had 4 trips to Fugue - 3 of them for one-off 'specials', and the first being my stay through Sept. and Oct. 1993. About a year ago, I heard Fugue had got themselves a 4th FM frequency, the Station was big before - but now it was massive. When I called them - just to say Hi (although with another 'special' in mind, of course) I was surprised to hear that one of the 'conglomerates' had taken them over - and Mattheu, and Pascal, and Manu - had all moved on. Still, I look back on that initial visit in 1993, as one of my happiest Radio memories to date.

Previous Broadcasts : Rich Phoenix


Much has been said and alleged about radio people. Generally, the more unbelievable and radical the stories become, the closer to the real truth you are. I am living proof that some of the best radio stories stem from stations no longer to be found on your radio dial. Why the stories outlive the stations conjures up myriad questions, and may be explained, in part, by the innate creativity of real radio people whose instincts spring from the "theatre of the mind" philosophy that drove radio in its "golden age." In the U.S., during the "golden age," there was virtually no television -- the medium was simply under development, and not yet ready for the mass market. American radio of the golden age was characterized by dramas, comedies and talks coming from the top talent that could be mustered from Hollywood, the West End and Broadway. Radio announcers of the era were of a different calibre, and dressed the part. Think of a bloke attired like a penguin in white tie and tails standing ramrod-straight before an RCA 44BX on a floor stand preparing to intone either the opening credits of a drama, setting the aural stage or putting a plug in for floor wax, and you will begin to capture, mentally, the mindset that drives radio people, even if they are confined to spinning records, CDs, MP3s et seq., punching buttons and watching what passes for metres these days. This was the aura encountered at one particular station where I spent days and nights playing tunes, participating in over-the-air dramas and exploring "dog houses" on a nightly basis. Now, this one wasn’t even a classic-looking radio station, except for its four in-line towers in the back lot with glowing, blinking red marker lights. Inside, the equipment was reasonably functional although decidedly not brand-new nor even the other extreme, decrepit, as became so common in many American radio stations hanging by a thread in the ‘80s. Arguably, the technical aura created by working in the midst of a major 10-kilowatt radio frequency haze and lobe took its mental and physical toll on most of us. To make the situation more extreme, since this was a highly directional station, it could also have been determined that we were working in the equivalent of a field of over 100,000 watts effective radiated power -- kind of makes the output of a microwave oven or cell phone tower look pretty puny by comparison. So, whether all this power fried our brains, carbonated our hormones or imposed a dose of electromagnetic "speed," on our beings, the effects were cumulative and measurable in our relative lack of mental stability. Couple the raw power with our classic radio mission to communicate, and you had a very dangerous situation. We were prone to extremes, and it became something the audience expected and suspected from us at regular intervals. It wasn’t Thanksgiving if someone hadn’t phonied-up a pseudo parade with sound effects and off-key marching band music down a mythical Main Street in our town. It wasn’t Halloween if we hadn’t blown the dust off the old Orson Welles transcription and played "War of the Worlds" just once more; and, it wasn’t Easter if some bogus contest weren’t giving away a huge stuffed bunny more pneumatic than the Playboy variety which would have surely terrorized any small child within ten feet of its presence. It was in this setting where I was "doing nights" on my own with an unlocked door, a reasonably-sized record library at my disposal and the responsibility and expectation to follow in the footsteps of my radio forebears. On this particular night, one of my then steadfast drinking buddies, a fellow radio adherent, had apparently run afoul with the wife of a time salesman, with the two of them discovered in a local motel by the husband in flagrante delictu. For some inexplicable reason, they had decided to sort out their differences in the lobby of the station. Before I knew it, the salesman, to his accompanying wife's pure horror, had pulled a .38 police special and blown away my friend in my full view (at least through the control room mirror) while I attempted to keep the music coming. I relate this story in its full regalia, as Governor Reece has asked that we come up with a true episode from our radio careers that might entertain all on the new website. Three things to know about the incident -- it was most realistic, although staged, the salesman was using blanks (he claimed), and I was awfully glad to have "Hey Jude," "MacArthur Park" and "Stairway to Heaven" at my disposal.

Ms Street : The Answers

Zoe Street says :

Why are you involved in The Album Zone ?
Because, to coin a Madness phrase, it's the rockingest sound around!

What's your favourite colour ?
It varies, but as I'm a girl, pink is always good.

What's your favourite sweets ?

Mochi! (little Japanese, glutinous balls)

Favourite Food :
Mochi! (little Japanese etc etc)
Sushi generally.
And apple crumble. Not all at the same time though.

Least Favourite Food :
All of the above, but at the same time.

What do you want to be when you grow up ?
A dominatrix superhero who takes over the world of rock radio for my own nefarious desires...ahahahahahaaaa!

Choose ONE word to describe yourself :
Optimistic (see above)

What could you not live without ?

Who could you not live without ?
The man who makes mochi.
And my beloved boyfriend.

What's the greatest Single ever made ?
Just the one ? Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick by good ol' Ian and the Blockheads is a winner, but sorry, I've got to name another - it's Oh Shit! by Buzzcocks, as this song dragged me through troubled adolescence and beyond.

What's the greatest Album ever made ?
"Another Music In A DIfferent Kitchen" - Buzzcocks
And I'm digging "02" by blues maestro Son Of Dave. But it varies.

If you could change something about yourself, what would it be ?
I'd be more discreet

Do you love Custard ?
Never used to, but that changed when gifts of apple crumble and Sainsbury's Taste the Difference custard with vanilla pods were brought into my flat. I sure did taste the difference, I was practically bathing in the stuff.

Favourite subject at School :
Art and English

Least favourite subject at School:
Maths and science. Ugh!

Mode of Transport :
Hoop and stick

IQ :

Colour of Socks :
Socks ? SOCKS ? Stockings, if you don't mind, either black or natural.

Favourite Pet :

Favourite Smartie colour :
Blue obviously!

Favourite flavour of Crisps :

Favourite Places :
London is where me heart lies, Gawd bless it. And the Album Zone studio of course. Or my boudoir, eating mochi in the nude.

You are moving to the Moon, but you are allowed to take just THREE personal possessions with you. What would they be ?
My boyfriend
My record collection
My stereo

Best Friend :
Oh, you know...

Worst Friend :
Is this not an oxymoron? Head hurts...

Best TV Programmes ever :
Blankety Blank

Best Radio Programmes ever :

Erm, Pogo Sessions on Album Zone (my show! my show!)

Best Films ever :
Pogo does Prestatyn

Best Song Lyric ever :
"Then suddenly, like a fly in my cup of tea" - Is It A Dream - The Damned
"I don't have to tell her / I'm a super fella" - I Wanna Be Her Hero - The Lurkers

Best advice you've ever been given :

I never take advice, I am the all knowing Oracle.
(Oh all right, "Shut up and get on with it," Joe Strummer. Not given to me, exactly, but rings true)

Worst advice you've ever been given :
I never take advice, I am the all knowing Oracle

Final thoughts :
Lots of love to you all, dwarlings...